Narcissists are known for being self-serving and self-centered. They have little regard for the feelings of others and tend to put themselves first in all situations. But what about their children? Do narcissists love their kids? Narcissists may be cold and uncaring, but that doesn’t mean they don’t feel anything towards their offspring. It just means that any love they feel is limited to what they get from them. Yes, narcissists can demonstrate a certain level of affection towards their children. In fact, they might even show more care than most parents would under the same circumstances. But this doesn’t mean that a narcissist actually loves his or her kids. Let’s take a look at some of the telltale signs:
Do narcissists love their children?
Narcissists are very good at hiding their true feelings. They can easily fake emotions that they don’t really feel just to get what they want from you. This is why it can be so difficult to tell if someone is a narcissist or not. Narcissists don’t necessarily hate their children – but they also don’t necessarily love them either. Their feelings towards their kids tend to be very conditional and based on what the children can do for them, rather than how the children make them feel. This means that narcissists would never sacrifice something they want or need just because it would hurt one of their kids, even if that kid was their own child! A narcissist will always put themselves first, even if it hurts someone else. How a narcissistic parent treats his or her kids depends on the situation and how he or she feels about those kids at any given time.
How To Tell If A Narcissist Loves Their Children
They Try To Control Everything
When it comes to narcissists, the only thing that matters is their own needs. Their children are extensions of themselves and extensions must be controlled. This is why narcissists will try to control everything their children do. They want them to think and act just like them, so they will set up strict rules that must not be broken.
They Are Controlling Of Their Children’s Lives
Narcissists want their kids to live exactly how they live – in other words, perfectly. They want them to have the same interests, hobbies, friends, and lifestyles as they do. Since they are rarely happy with anything less than perfection, this means that their children will never get a break from being criticized or told what to do. A narcissist may love his or her kids, but this doesn’t mean that he or she won’t try to control every aspect of their life!
They Talk About Their Kids’ Brains And Bodies
Narcissists are obsessed with their own brains and bodies, so they will show similar interest in the brains and bodies of their children. They will talk about them excessively and show an intense level of concern for their well-being. They may even check on them more than most parents would. But this doesn’t mean that narcissists love their kids – it just means that they are worried about them and want to make sure that they’re okay.
They Don’t Give Their Kids A Break
Since a narcissist is always focused on himself or herself, he or she can rarely get past his or her own problems enough to focus on someone else’s issues for any amount of time. This is why a narcissist will rarely give his or her kids a break from negative comments, criticism, and complaints – even when they have done nothing wrong! A narcissist may love his or her kids, but this doesn’t mean that he or she won’t be critical of them!
They Are Not Empathetic
A narcissist can’t feel what others feel, so he or she can’t understand how his or her kids feel. This means that even if a narcissist really loves his or her kids, he or she will most likely not be able to empathize with them when they are upset. He or she may even tell them that they shouldn’t be upset or to just get over it! Needless to say, this is not the way that a loving parent would talk to their children.
They Try To Keep Them In The Same Roles
Narcissists love playing the role of parent, but they don’t like changing roles and having someone else play the role of parent. This means that they will try to keep their kids in the same roles throughout their lives – just like narcissists try to stay in the same roles throughout their lives! A narcissist may love his or her kids, but this doesn’t mean that he or she won’t try to keep them in their roles throughout their lives.
Showing Regard For Appearance
- The narcissist takes an interest in their child’s appearance. They might be very concerned about how their child looks and what they wear. They might insist that the child wear certain clothes and even criticize them if they don’t look “good enough.”
- The narcissist is very concerned with how others perceive their child. They might push the kid to do well in school, sports, or some other activity so that others will see them as a good parent and superior human beings.
- The narcissist is not afraid to show off their children to others in order to make themselves look good. If they are having trouble at work, they will use their kids as an example of how great things are going at home. On the other hand, if things are going well for them at work, they will also use their kids as examples of why they should get special treatment and perks because of what a great job they are doing.
- The narcissist will be very concerned with how their children are perceived by others. They might go out of their way to make sure that the child is dressed properly and doesn’t say anything to embarrass them.
- The narcissist will be very concerned with what others think of them as a parent, especially if they have a reputation for being cold and uncaring towards others. They want everyone to think that they are great parents and that they are raising upstanding citizens.
Excessive Discipline
- They’re overly strict. Narcissists may seem too strict at times. They expect their kids to follow their rules to the letter and are quick to punish them for even the smallest infractions. This is because narcissists want to make sure that their children know who is in charge.
- They’re overprotective. Narcissists can be extremely overprotective of their children, especially if they believe they are special or have high potential. This can cause problems when a child needs to learn how to take care of himself or herself. A narcissist might do things like cut off a child’s allowance, not let him drive, or prevent her from getting a job until she’s older and “ready.”
- They’re emotionally manipulative. Narcissists are often emotionally manipulative, and this can extend into their relationship with their kids as well. The child might be made to feel guilty for wanting anything the parent doesn’t approve of or for voicing any concerns she might have.
- They’re overly critical. Narcissists are always looking to put people down, and their children are no exception. A narcissist might be overly critical of her child’s looks, behavior, or accomplishments in order to make herself look better by comparison.
- They’re over-involved. Narcissists might try to be involved in every aspect of their child’s life, from what she wears to where she goes and who she hangs out with. This is because the narcissistic parent wants to keep her child under her control at all times so that she can feel good about herself by comparison.
Showers Gifts To Their Child
- The narcissist showers his or her child with gifts. This doesn’t mean that the parent is necessarily trying to buy the child’s affection, though. Narcissists are materialistic creatures and love to see their children in the same manner that they see themselves: as someone special and important. Narcissistic parents don’t usually have a problem spending money on their kids, especially if they feel like they get something out of it.
- The narcissist brags about his or her child to friends and family members. Narcissists want everyone to know how special their children are, so they won’t hesitate to boast about them at every given opportunity. They might talk about how intelligent their kids are or how successful they will be in life, but it’s all coming from a place of pride, not love. The narcissist wants others to see his or her children in a positive light because he feels like he is being validated through them.
- The narcissist is overprotective of his or her children. Narcissists aren’t fond of change, and they don’t like to be challenged in any way. As a result, they will often try to keep their kids from growing up too fast by sheltering them from the outside world. They might not be strict disciplinarians because that would make it too obvious that they don’t really understand what it means to be a parent, but they will still do whatever it takes to keep their kids safe.
- The narcissist plays favorites with his or her children. Narcissists are incapable of treating everyone in the same manner, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that one child might get more attention than the others. It doesn’t matter if he or she is the oldest or youngest; if the narcissist sees something special in one of his or her kids, he or she will do everything in his or her power to make sure that this particular child grows up feeling superior to the rest.
Conclusion
Narcissists can show their children love, but it’s not likely to be the kind of love other parents feel for their children. Narcissists can shower their kids with gifts and lavish them with attention, but it’s unlikely to be done out of love. Rather, it’s likely to be done to gain their children’s affection and make them feel obligated to their parents. A narcissistic parent who loves their children will shower them with attention, give them gifts, and make sure they have everything they need. They’re likely to put their kids’ needs before the needs of others and show them excessive discipline when they misbehave. A narcissistic parent who loves their children doesn’t do it out of unconditional love. Rather, they show their kids love because it benefits them.
